I really hate those England games that ITV shows. They’re just painful to watch. Not because of all the ad breaks. Not because Steve Rider’s just dull. And not because those sponsorship breakers are just unfunny.
No. The real problem is that ITV gives its big games to that dynamic commentary duo of Clive Tyldesley and Gareth Southgate. Tyldesley gives us a few choice bon mots before the game’s even started. Then before the first ten minutes of the game are up, he’s bemoaning England’s lack of goals in the competition so far. Six minutes later and he’s back on the same hobby horse, telling us how many goals Brazil began their last World Cup winning campaign with.
At least we had Joe Coles superb goal to take our minds off Tyldesley and Southgate.
The second half and I’ve given up on ITV’s commentary altogether. The TV goes onto mute, and I’m listening to Five Live. There is the slight issue that Alan Green and co. are managing to describe play before I see it. I’ll live with it. I’d rather have it on mute at the moment than endure Tyldesley.
We’re through at any length.